Finding Happiness Despite Debt

There comes a time when you just get sick and tired of keeping numbers, phoning the creditors, writing down the phone conversation you had with them and paying off the debt ever so slowly.

You wake up one morning and life still hasn't gotten you where you want to go. You find yourself in the middle of the wreckage of your life or to be more concise, a bad dream. No matter what words you use to describe it, it really is a pain to go through all of this. You've gone this far, and now think you'd like to coast for awhile. You think 'I can just do a little more shopping than I actually have the money for and maybe I don't really need to look at the numbers and write them down daily and maybe that old credit card I put in the freezer can be thawed and I'll get it and .....'

STOP!

It does get tiresome. You haven't arrived at the point when all the statements have zero balances. I'll give you that, having been there. But despite the children wanting a new iPAD, you needing new golf clubs, the oven burning everything, I'm going to tell you to keep on keeping your numbers daily and going to the mailbox daily and opening the mail daily. And communicating regularly with your creditors.

Just don't give up.

Some of you might not have this exact problem, but when you were using credit cards, all the things you did before didn't exactly work for you the way you'd hoped. Right? So you might as well stick it out and get to the end of all this chaos.

If you want to feel good, you can.

If you don't want to feel good, you can.

So here you are paying off the debt slowly, thinking to yourself, 'Well isn't this just a tea cup ride.' I get that. I would wake up with vertigo so bad I couldn't walk. And each time the phone range, I'd get another migraine. Now is the precise time to keep your chin up because it will payoff. And better than you think.

Here's what I would suggest. If you're feeling agitated and you're outdoors, go indoors. Go anywhere else than where you are. Meet a friend at a coffee shop. Vent if you must, but consider that you may be on the threshold of something wonderful and it may just be around the corner. You're being treated to life doing what life does. And your role now is to have fun. You're allowed. You're worthy of it. You're doing a helluva job getting out of debt and becoming a very bright light to your loved ones who need to see you getting out of debt, even if you're whining and pouting.

Going without an iPad is precisely the right thing to do. Your children love being with YOU! That's an entire Universe better than an iPad. Doing things together will transform your family life into something you could never have imagined.

This is it. It isn't the next lifetime. It's now. Go for broke. Play, laugh, enjoy yourself and be happy. Truly happy, not just ho-hum happy. But giddy happy. Putting a smile on your face has proven at the cellular level to make you happy. So keep smiling. Sounds trite? Sure, but smile anyway.

"Your life is supposed to feel good to you, and you are meant to feel happiness in your life - and you are meant to satisfy your dreams." ~ Abraham-Hicks

Getting Out of Debt On Your Timetable

Many readers may find these solutions overwhelming.

Overwhelming? Is that not what your debt is?

Some may say, "But my situation isn't that bad" and then go on to describe exactly how bad their situation actually is.

Of course I'm not in your exact situation. I can't be in anyone's exact situation. That's why I've discussed the underearner as well as the compulsive shopper. That's why I say the amount of your debt is not the issue. Donald Trump once owed over 9.2 billion dollars to 99 banks. In the middle of a dark and rainy night, he ran 15 blocks ( the limo was not available) to make phone calls to all his creditors from another's creditor's conference room where he confirmed he was good for the debt and would pay it off in due time, and it wouldn't take a millenium. In the book, he said his big mistake was promising to always pay the interest, then advised to never promise anything. The Financial Genie agrees with that sound advice.

All of us at one point or another, made a decision to take out unsecured debt and then we purchased lots of things and the things became more things and those things had baby things. And now we're screeching like banshees about how bad things have become.

This book is about debt and offers a way to get out without giving in to your creditors. You're going to be doing things on your timetable and in a way that's convenient for you. We are not about to tell you to obey the orders of the creditors. They are not managing us. We are the drivers of this locomotive and as such will come up with inspiring solutions, at which point we get to say I did it without caving. We did it because it felt good to act like a professional business person doing business with creditors.

You are the solution dealing with the problem, which will over time nest itself somewhere in a cabinet drawer out of sight and soon out of mind. Payments will be made. Offers of 50% off the debt will come in. My advice is not to accept that offer, but thank them for the kind offer and continue to make your regular payments. Why? Because you will have to file a 1099 form at the end of the year which means the 50% they discounted you is counted by the IRS as income. So don't do it. Unless you want to pay more in taxes. In this instance, the call is yours.

Continue to pay what you can and steadily and slowly over time your life will start to improve. Just how will it improve? The old way of shopping for all the schlock you thought you couldn't live without is going the way of the Edsel automobile, a good idea at the time, but not a very good purchase. You'll find more time to spend on the important elements of your life, your hobbies, your vocation, your job, fun playing with family and friends, going to the games, going to the mountains or the beach and taking time away from everything. Now you get to be CEO of celebrations, in charge of all the fun.

The Financial Genie believes this is the party planet. I know. I know, the Genie gone wild. Don't you want to relax and play and have fun and be happy and free? Freedom, remember that? That's how I felt when I graduated from high school and went to the beach with my classmates, alone without parents, the radio blaring in the VW. Suntanned, happy and joyously free.

This is when you might consider writing your own Mission Statement or Declaration of Independence, a template of how you'd like your life to be going forward.

"For a while, the only evidence of your financial progress will be your improved emotional state of being, and if you will let that be enough - taking no score of financial progress - the financial improvement will show up." ~ Abraham - Hicks

The Single K and Other Things You Didn't Know

The Single K is a 401K for single self employed people who cannot establish a 401K because of their self employment. This little known Single K or Individual 401K has great tax implications. There are any number of financial institutions that will not charge a fee to establish your Single K. This means that your Single K will have a manager and the amount you fund will be invested in quality investments. Your tax liability will be reduced as you will be able to take a tax deduction on both your personal income as well as the business's income.

There will come a time when you have more cash flow and can't decide what to do with it. The Single K may be an ideal fit for you and your money to rest safely while earning and giving you and your business a tax break. This qualifies it for no-brainer status.

There's also a little known item I learned while paying off my car. I was sending in the amount I owed every month two to three weeks earlier than the due date. This meant that the daily interest was reduced and more was going to the principle which brought the final payment date closer.

There are numerous benefits to seeing money as a friend, not an enemy. Ridiculous, you say. Maybe not. We all live in a yellow submarine - of sorts - and when we go to our neighborhood Ace Hardware store or to our local restaurant, dry cleaners, shoe repair or nail salon, we are in essence sharing and spreading the wealth. This is what many of the good money managers know. Money abhors a vacuum. The labor done by those who bring us the service also brings us the opportunity to spend money. Okay now I'm not talking about compulsively spending the money. What I'm saying is, spending money is a good thing, especially for those of us who used to be underearners.

When you're taking care of yourself in this way, the Universe sees a means to bring more. The Law of the Vacuum is in effect. Cleaning out your closet to get rid of something usually brings with it a new wardrobe. With money, it's the same. Did it please you to spend the money at the dry cleaners? Did you enjoy some rare fine dining and give the waiter a decent tip? If it gives you pleasure, there's more to come. But if you hoard the money and feel ripped off every time you spend money, the joy of spending it is reduced to the degree that you dislike doing it. Money has to flow. Like a giant river, it must do that. And it will always come back. Always!

I used to hate paying taxes. I walked into the accountant's office in fear and trepidation. With little money to pay the IRS, I was in a state of apoplexy about what to do. Numb might be the perfect word to describe me back in those days. But that was then and this is now. Today I say,"I get to pay taxes." More importantly, behind those words are some values I have about the country, state and city I live in. It helps to reevaluate the good things that happen to us as a result of some forward thinking state politicians and board members in charge of municipalities. If you live in this mind set, you'll notice a big change in how you look at your life and everything will take on a rosier glow, including your finances.

I have a friend who was out of work for ten months. But he wasn't all that upset about it. He was paying down the debt and was well on his way toward being debt free. What happened next may surprise you.

After he was fired from the awful job he'd been doing for ten years, he took his family on vacation for a month all over the United States. He instinctively knew he'd get a job when he got back and he had trust that God would provide for him and his family. That he had a prudent reserve helped to a degree. When he returned from his much needed adventure, he was adamant that he was not going to take just any job. He would consider his options long and hard and wait until the perfect fit came his way. And in short order it did. He didn't agonize. He didn't pound his chest. He didn't race all over applying for work. He waited. And then, because he was allowing all that good to come his way, he got the best job he ever had, describing it as his professional home.

Sweet might be the word to describe my emotional state today. The IRS is no longer the enemy. If you think a thing is going to be hard or difficult, you may be right. If you think a thing will go smoothly, you may be right.

Choices. You always have choices.

"Financial abundance does not occur in one's life because of hard work or good luck or favoritism - financial abundance is simply the Universe's response to consistent thoughts and feelings of abundance." ~ Abraham - Hicks

Imagine Your Life

When you imagine how you'd like your life to be, while acknowledging and appreciating where you are in the present, there's less to worry about.

Imagine what it would feel like if you walked to the mailbox and there were no more credit card bills. Imagine what not having a $43,000 balance due would feel like. Imagination can be potent when you realize you no longer have to duke it out in the ring with creditors about late fees, interest rates, or being sent to collections. That show is over. And it didn't win any awards!

Visualizing this in a quiet moment, eyes shut, drowning out sound and picturing in your mind how this would feel is an awesome experience. Living life with no credit cards means having more money available. Never mind the naysayers. You can rent a car, you can pay for a cruise and you can buy a house without a credit card or score.

Since 1997, I've been credit-card-free and my life has become a whole lot simpler. Over the top simpler. I haven't looked at my credit report for over four years. Life is simple. Life is good. Life is not complicated or full of chaos or crises. The first time I walked into a store and paid cash was a watershed moment. I felt it viscerally. Now when I go into a store and pay cash, I look around to see if there may be anything else I want and pay for that with cash. As the ads say, cash is king! Incurring new debt is not even on the radar. It has blown away in the icy winds of a nor'easter. Think you might like to buy a house or car and pay for them in full with cash? You may even be able to do that sooner than you think.

Eventually, you may even have more cash reserves than you had contemplated and, if you're like me, you may find it difficult to know what to do with so much cash! Trust me, this is a problem lots of people would like to have. Be aware that our dearly departed credit card companies will still offer you new cards along with rewards to make you come back. But the best reward is living without plastic. Can you imagine that?

Try imagining more about how your life would look. Are there trips you'd like to take, classes, new home furnishings? I've always wanted to create an endowment for the arts and just recently started a seed fund. Remember earlier I mentioned the "Gracious Living Fund?" Well, now is the time for that. Start putting aside a sum of money for such things. Want to sail in the Greek Isles? Take classes at the Cordon Bleu in Paris? Go scale Mount Everest? Anything is possible. Soon things will begin to look up and your life will morph into something wonderful. Visualizing a change of career or meeting someone wonderful may be in your vision. Keep doing the imagining and watch what happens. It may turn out light years better than you could have imagined. I know because I quit a job I really loved in order to work for myself and there is no going back for me.

Here's a promise from the Financial Genie. If you stick to these simple and easy principles, you will succeed and be prosperous and have unimaginable abundance in your life. And by that I mean abundance in all areas or your life. Get ready for some fun, more play, more laughter, happiness and freedom. It's out there waiting for you.

Abundance expands proportionately to meet desires. ~ Abraham-Hicks

There's Always Another Way

We all think we can do this alone. But this is not true. At some point, you might think that getting out of debt is easy. That all you have to do is just start paying it off. But there's more to it than numbers. For example, you suddenly hear that a family member who lives far away has a serious illness and you have no money to fly up to see her. Since you closed out all your credit cards, you think, "I'm just going to have to get another credit card." That's when you cave and start using unsecured debt again.

By now you're thinking the Financial Genie has got it all wrong. And thinking all is lost, you give in.

Before you go out and hit the credit card campus, you do have several options. One such is to call one of your buddies, the smart one who admires you for what you're doing to get out of debt, the one you call to bookend as described earlier. Don't rush to judgement, as you may well be able to use your prudent reserve in the interim. Another possibility is to sell something you really don't need or use any longer. Collateralizing something of value that someone else wants is a way to get some money for real emergencies. This is not the time to get deeper into debt.

Support can come from a financial advisor, a friend, a mentor or therapist. You want to choose people who are themselves solvent and not using unsecured debt, someone who is financially healthy. This does not mean you can borrow from them, but rather use them as support, the kind of support that understands you as you tell your story. If all you can find is someone who listens well, you're going to feel much better about what you're going through. Some support may come from family. Mainly, you're looking to talk it out and gain some insight. You're not going to borrow money. There are also online, phone and face to face support groups as well. One such is Debtor's Anonymous which deals directly with these issues.

A word of caution about getting help from your employer. It happened to me when I was having car problems. The repair costs were out of this world. I was talking to someone about this at work when my boss walked past. He brought me into his office and offered to help me out financially. I thanked him but told him I don't borrow money. He was understanding and kind and said, "Well, it's there if you need it." I did not take him up on his offer because it's never a good idea to owe your boss money. They have power over you as the employee anyway. But when you owe them money, that power grows incrementally and you're also seen as someone who doesn't know how to handle personal finances. That and I really didn't want to use unsecured debt. Though I was building up my prudent reserve, it hadn't grown to the amount I needed to pay for the repairs.

Money can be used as power in other areas. In a marriage or partnership, when one is not working and the other one is paying for everything, there is the danger that power and control will come into play. Money issues can be deal breakers. If you're solvent, not using unsecured debt and earning money that is yours, there's really not a problem. But, if only one person is working, and the other is not or is earning very little, this can cause problems down the road. These are issues that can be easily resolved as long as the partners can come to some agreement. This is not to say that once in awhile when one or the other is out of work and needs financial support while they're actively looking for work, that the other partner can't help them out. It does mean that even in difficult times, using unsecured debt will throw you a curve ball.

Staying the course, riding it out and getting support for those emergencies or protracted unemployment, will help keep you on the right track. Just know that you're investing in you and you are important.

To avoid vagueness, try a little clarity. Look at your numbers daily. ~ The Financial Genie

You Are Not Your Debt

For many of us, debt is worn like a shield, our armor against the cold winds of Fate. But debt is actually nothing, a whisper of nothing, an illusion. Granted we do owe people, companies and agencies. But this is all it is. When paying our bills, we suit up in our new uniform of being a responsible grown up and play again. The good news is, there is no debtor's prison, and the debt police - unless you refuse to file with the IRS - are not banging on your door. More than likely you have a prison of your own, making your mind a dangerous place to be.

But you are not your debt. You're so much more. You, your life and family, your dreams and goals and accomplishments are just many facets of who you really are and beneath all of those things is the spirit and energy of you. Your debt is just one of those niggling things you need to take care of. Do not make more of it than you already have. After a few months - the length of time it takes runs the gamut - you will begin to see improvement. But give it time. If you owe in the six figures, it will take time. Same for those who have debt in the five figures or less. Time takes time. And with just a little effort, you'll start seeing changes, making life a whole lot easier.

A word about your net worth. You are also not your net worth. Though we do live in a culture that values the net worth. In truth, those numbers don't have as much meaning for most of us as one believes. Still, this is a little exercise to do for yourself to gain more clarity about your numbers.

Add up all the debt you have. This would include the car and house as well, even though they are secured debt. Then add up your cash balances, savings, investments, the house if it's paid for, art, jewelry, household items, boats, and other recreational items you own outright. Take the larger number and subtract the smaller number and you have your net worth.

How does it look? A better question to ask is how do you feel about what you see?

If the net worth is in the minus column, then a year or so down the road, tally these numbers again. In my case, my net worth was on the plus side by exactly the same amount years earlier my debt amounted to.

The main thing is not to worry. Worrying doesn't pay down the debt. It just adds years to your life and causes aches and pains. The United States Government doesn't worry. The Federal Reserve isn't worried about your debt. Your neighbor isn't worried and your friends aren't worried - maybe because they have their own debt worries. Still, you can relax. If you're paying the debt off and communicating with your creditors, you have permission to exhale.

I'll conclude with the subject of meditation. Meditating, whether you're sitting in your lazy boy and staring out the window or sitting in a yogic position and chanting softly, is an important exercise in mindfulness. I know, I know. Those hippy days are over. But now we're calling it mindfulness and it really does work. Do some research for yourself or go to a yoga ashram and see how you feel when you leave. We all lead lives of quiet desperation and need to calm down and become more centered. It's such an easy fifteen minute exercise and softens the mind so it stops ruining your day. If thoughts are racing while you attempt to do this exercise, simply thank the thoughts and watch them as they leave your mind, rather the way you might watch a movie in a theater. Eventually, the ease of sitting comfortably and relaxing will come naturally to you. It sure will get you where you want to go faster.

"Sometimes I just sits and thinks. And sometimes I just sits." ~ Anonymous

The Red Tide of Debt

It's time to consider what debt does to us.

The hardship of paying unusually high interest rates may make you sick, damage your relationship with your spouse and, if allowed to go untreated, may mean foreclosure, bankruptcy and/or homelessness.

To put it simply, the tears have still not dried on my eyes, even though it's only been a year since I got out of debt, closed my accounts, torn up my credit cards and vowed never to use any unsecured debt. Still, the fear exists that there's not enough love, not enough money, not enough food, not enough work. After long and painful years communicating with creditors, seeing added penalties, late charges and extremely high interest rates, the stress just grew. Money does have an energy all its own. But it builds muscle when we give it power over our lives. Much like the red tide that washes over the shoreline, killing fish, birds and marine mammals, the red ink of debt can annihilate us.

But there are things we can do while we are slowly getting out of debt. And one such way is to do just that: GET OUT OF DEBT S-L-O-W-L-Y. The reason for this is simple. Well beneath the pyramid of debt lies the truth. We have overshopped or underearned because it felt good and for the time being we needed something outside ourselves to make us feel good. The inside wasn't feeling so hot.

It's one thing to get out of debt by filing bankruptcy. But that usually ends up being just another quick fix. So is credit counseling which builds another debt as they charge exorbitant fees. And, before you know it, you're back doing what you've always done. By paying down the debt slowly, you will hopefully take a look at why you've allowed this to happen on a deeper level. Once armed with this new information, you'll be getting out of debt sooner. There's more to it than just the numbers.

So how do we know what it is and how to stop it from happening again?

You may consider seeing a therapist to pick up the missed stitches of your life. Your perspective on money may be skewed. Do you see it as evil? Are the rich seen as merely bourgeois and greedy? You may have had parents who fought about money all the time. There are plenty of reasons why you've gotten yourself into debt. And there could be reasons that are not of your doing.

Money as rocks? Beads and shells? Money as barter for time and services? As paper or precious metals? Money can be symbolic of a lot of things in other cultures. But the one culture that counts is you. How do you see it? Do you see it flowing away from you. Or is it the steady stream of Niagra Falls, always more where it came from? There are many questions to ask ourselves to help get rid of the poverty consciousness, or, conversely, the consciousness of entitlement we may still hold onto.

The economy, through its upturns and downturns, may be an excuse for why you're in the straits you're in. But in the worst of times I made more money than I ever did in the best of economic times. So it's really not about the economy. Straight up, whatever got you into debt can be turned around in no time at all.

It isn't voodoo. You can still get out of debt.

"Money is spiritual" ~ Anonymous